Saturday, May 17, 2014

Jokes

The girls are really into telling jokes these days.  Here are a few that they graced us with at dinner and on our car ride home.


Julia's jokes:
(they have a potty theme in the punch line each time)

Why did the cow drink milk?  Because he pees on his tail.

Why does the cow eat some food?  Because the horseman let him drink it and then he pees on his tail too.

Why did the kite drink milk on the person?  Because he pooped.


Riley's jokes:
(Riley wants you to know that her jokes don't have a potty theme in the punch line each time)

Why did the girl want her tooth out?  Because she couldn't chew!
Her explanation:  Get it?  Because I lost my tooth!

Riley:  Hey Mom, will you not remember me in a year?
Me:  No I won't.
Riley:  Will you not remember me in a month?
Me:  I definitely will not.
Riley:  Will you really not remember me in a day?
Me:  I really won't.
Riley:  Knock, Knock
Me:  Is that you, Riley?
Riley: You already remembered me!

Her explanation of the joke immediately after was "That was the funniest joke I've ever told!  Don't you think so?  I'm good at jokes.  I've got a ton of jokes.  Are you writing this down? (I was typing it into my phone as we were driving and laughing)  Are you going to put this on Facebook?  Because it was really funny.  Don't I tell the funniest jokes?

Why did the girl tell cute jokes to her mom?  Because she knew her mom would put it on Facebook.

Jeremy then farts as soon as we pull into our driveway so Riley starts a new joke:
Why did the Daddy fart in the car?

Jeremy's punchline:  Because he wanted everybody out!


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